So it has been a very long time since I have written or done any updating on this blog.  I have come to realize that there is much for me to learn still, and much I already do know.  I have come to realize that it is time to start going back to the basics which started my love for the path I am on.  It is time for me to figure out what I do know and what I am.

I just started to read a new book.  The book “The Faery teachings” by Orion Foxwood and the first chapter had four basic questions that one should answer.  These four questions are the questions in which we all as humans seems to seek to find the answers to through life and religion and basicaly everything.  These four questions are the questions that essentially form the basis of the meaning of life.

The four questions are more basic than anything you may actually consider.  The first question is : Who am I?  The second question is :What is it? (What is God, the force behind creation, Spirit, ect).  The third question is Why do I exist?  The fourth question is finally Where do I/we go when we die or What happens when we die?.  These are the basic questions that all religions and philosophies seek to answer.

I am a college student who studies many things.  I study religion, anthropology, religion, philosophy, and in many ways psychology ans sociology.  All of these fields of study are interconnected.  All of these fields seek to understand the basis of what is essentially the human experience.  These areas of study are my passion and they fire my soul.  They are why I feel I am here.  I am here to gain understanding found in the mysteries of life through the exploration of mysticism found in comparative religions and folklore/theology.

One of the things I have neglected over the years is what “I know”.  The questions that Orion says we seek to answer are questions I have never actually really asked myself.  I keep reading and reading and saying “yes that makes sense” and what not.  When I am asked questions I never respond with “this is my thought”. I typically respond along the lines of “I don’t really know to be honest.”.  I have discredited what I know.

The only time I have ever considered what “I know” is when I have to write a paper for school.  My teachers have always told me I should be a writer.  I have been afraid of doing the writing and getting published.  I have never given myself enough credit for my knowledge.  I often amaze myself when I read my papers.  I have come to realize that the reason I feel I “know nothing” on any subject is that I doubt my personal experiences as well as my own thought processes when compared to others.

Upon finishing the first chapter in the book :”The Faery Teachings” I realized that it was time for me to consider what I know.  When the author explained why it was important to answer these questions before starting to follow any path, that it was time for me to actually answer these questions.  I feel part of the reason that I don’t really know what I am and who I am is that I have never asked myself these questions.  That is why honestly am not secure in my beliefs.

It is time for me now to answer these questions.  One of the ways I am going to get through these questions is for me to go through my old diaries.  There was a time when I was constantly writing anything and everything that came into my mind.  A lot of this will reflect who I am and my thoughts and beliefs at the time.  It will also mean going through some of my old papers  written at school and on my own.  It may even mean digging up very old and in depth gaia posts.

If I am to ever really consider myself a writer then I must start having my thoughts published somewhere.  I am going to start with this blog.  The next several “essays” will be responces based on the very first question “Who am I”.  The first article will be a basic biography of my life.  The second will more likely be more thought processes on a specific topic and then the rest will flow from there,

In many ways it may work out to being a book full of essays and exercises much like one of my favorite books on traditional witchcraft (and one I wrote a paper on) “The Witching Way of the Hollow Hill” by Robin Artisson.  This is one of the reasons I am starting with the blog.  I figure that it is best to start e-publishing through this blog.   

So this is the end of a year and the start of a new year.